My life was a challenge. I had deep feelings of being abandoned. I don’t know why this particular feeling kept haunting me, but it was always there. I had a job with the Government, I had a social status, I got married and eventually had a child. Everything on an external level was going well. Even as a child, I had good parents who loved me, so I can’t tell you where this feeling of abandonment came from. But it was there and that feeling made me an alcoholic. I was searching my lost meaning in alcohol maybe, but I also had the feeling that this is not the right path. Doing this, I cannot be happy forever .