My childhood had been a very happy one. We were 5 children and my family was very loving. It was a very safe place to grow. Even though my family was not very religious, my parents were very value oriented. Values like respect, justice, honesty, truthfulness were given prominence. As children we used to be together in the evenings and would chat about life. Life, values in life, things happening in the world and also moon and stars. It was an open space for us to ask questions, and I remember, while giving answers my parents were guiding us towards specific values.

In school I was an average student, not very crazy about studies, but very calm and peaceful. Another significant influence in my childhood were my grandparents by my mothers side. They were farmers with a lot of cattle. We used to spend school holidays with them, taking cows to meadows to graze. We got close to nature and the goodness of the rural village and the village folk definitely had a deep impact in shaping my personality later. The courage of a farmer was something which left a deep impact in my childhood. After my schooling, I went to England to study English. I was 18 then and something significant happened in my life. I lost my mother. Though my mother was not very religious, she was very spiritual.

She was reading spiritual books, about Buddhism, philosophy,about spiritual practises she was even part of an ashram and was into meditation. And in her last days, she kind of knew that she was about to leave her body, and me being the eldest of children, she kind of prepared me. She always wanted to live her life in an ashram, and after she left the body I started getting strong thoughts as if she was telling me that she is living life in an ashram and that she is happy. And I was quite courageous and on the very day my father came home after my mother left, I told him, ‘Life goes on. We have to move on”.

Though I was the elder sibling and in a way responsible to be a role model for them, I was also a young girl in the world wanting to discover the world, and that is the reason why I travelled to England for studies. I was not particularly passionate about English, but that was an excuse to travel and discover the world. Inside me, I was always a backpacker, ready to travel and discover people and cultures. I was able to manage my expenses as I had help from my father and I was working part-time.

Then I came back o France, I wanted to work and I got a job in an International British Found Brand of Women’s Fashion wear and Home decor. This company had a great value system that resonated with me. Like simplicity, respect for nature and not too glamorous. So work went on and when I was about 38 years of age, I had a spiritual crisis. I felt that something very important in life is escaping me. But I had no idea what it was. Working, getting married, going on holidays.... is that all? That was the question. At that time I didn’t even know that I was going through a spiritual crisis. I took a year off. What you call a sabbatical year. And I went to South-East Asia. Travelling with my round the world ticket, a few dollars in my pocket, discovering the world, I was happy. But then I came back to work, only to backpack again in six months. Till now, I had only discovered freedom. I still didn’t have the answers that I was searching for. And this time I quit my job. I didn’t think much about my security. I had trust in myself and I knew that things would be okay. Finding my answers was more important. And it was in that journey that I discovered Rajyoga which turned my life around forever. I will talk about my Rajyogi life sometimes in the future.

Patricia Mayer, 
Member of the Coordinating TEAM, 
France