By: Sarah Eagger
Source: The Daily Guardian https://epaper.thedailyguardian.com/view/2671/the-daily-guardian/15
Dated: July 5th, 2025
‘To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you’ - Lewes B. Smedes
Forgiveness is a powerful spiritual attribute. It is the ‘intentional decision to let go of anger and resentment or desire for revenge’. Those who have this beautiful virtue understand the value of freedom, and recognise that the real impact extends far beyond just two individuals.
The Hawaiian people have the understanding that the world we experience is a mirror of what is going on inside us. They have the awareness that we all contribute to whatever is happening to the world and to the self. They have a practice of reconciliation and forgiveness, which means to ‘make right’ or ‘to correct’. It is a prayer of forgiveness and acceptance and of cleansing the energies.
The name of their prayer is ‘Ho’oponopono’. This is the prayer:
I’m sorry – recognise and accept responsibility for what caused the situation, to the one wronged and to the universe.
Please forgive me – a request to make amends, to the higher self and the universe
Thank you – an opportunity to show gratitude to the higher self and the universe.
I love you – is said to the universe as a form of gratitude – for allowing me this earthly experience whereby I learn.
It takes a great deal of strength and humility, especially when we feel as if we are the victim, to be able to say, ‘I’m sorry’, but this prayer, or attitude, is a way to liberate the soul from the karmic ties that have been created through many lifetimes. For those on a spiritual path, who have become aware that we are originally peaceful beings of light, we begin to understand that if we find ourselves in situations that are difficult, with people who are difficult, we have somehow, somewhere, contributed to what is unfolding. Whatever is happening is for a reason; there is something to learn, a chance to practise forgiveness, to develop the power to discriminate, a chance to respond differently. There is a very deep significance in difficult situations that inspire us to respond in a higher way. When we forgive, we settle a karmic account. If we do not, we run the risk of perpetuating the account and open the way to more hurt.
Forgiveness is powerful. Research shows that forgiveness reduces stress and anxiety, enhances emotional well-being, improves mental health, increases empathy and compassion, induces better sleep and physical health, gives a greater sense of control and empowerment, enhances social connections and increases the chance of personal growth and transformation. The ripple effect is the impact on the wider community.
Forgiveness is a journey that requires patience, understanding and self-compassion. It is not something that can be resolved just by the words ‘I forgive you’ unless a deep process has taken place inside first. There has to be an acknowledgement of all the emotions involved, an understanding of all the causes before the decision to forgive can move us towards working through the pain, and letting go of resentment.
Meditation helps a great deal in these processes. Taking time in the early morning to be in silence and calm, can help to integrate the healing and awaken the recognition of what needs to be accomplished and how it can be done. The freedom and lightness of being that follows such a deep practice of forgiving, is the beautiful reward of having had the courage, humility, and self-compassion to begin the journey.
‘The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong’ - Mahatma Gandhi
Dr. Sarah Eagger, a long-time practitioner of Rajyoga, is Chair of the Janki Foundation
and a retired consultant psychiatrist formerly at Imperial College, London.
