By: Neville Hodgkinson
Source: The Daily Guardian https://epaper.thedailyguardian.com/view/2910/the-daily-guardian/15
Dated: August 30th, 2025
Although it seems completely illogical to prevent one’s own self from achieving personal goals, all well within reach, many people find themselves doing exactly that, with or without realising what they are doing. Research suggests that this illogical behaviour is rooted in many fears, the most substantial of which is fear of becoming the person I really want to be. To become that person requires me to let go completely of all that I am now.
Through Rajyoga meditation I have learned that I can immerse my mind in feelings of peace, love, and joy within, recognising myself as a spirit or soul, distinct from the body. This awareness puts me back in the driving seat of my feelings and emotions, instead of being pushed and pulled by unconscious drives from the body and brain. When I know myself deeply as a soul, I also connect to a higher power.
I have noticed, however, that even after many years of this practice, there are times when I still let old habits of mind exert an influence. I may feel isolated and alone, for example, or unloved and misunderstood. Then it becomes harder to maintain good wishes towards others.
Sometimes this tendency is attributed to a laziness of the intellect, that wonderful human faculty which, when active and wise, helps to keep my thoughts, feelings, relationships and actions positive. Feeding the intellect with extra spiritual study certainly helps to keep it fresh and clear.
But why does it sometimes become lazy? Why are there times when, having been enjoying a full sense of being my true, benevolent self, I suddenly find myself afflicted again by a feeling of emptiness, and a need to fall back into limited habits of mind and behaviour?
The answer may lie in understanding the difference between a love for life, and a lust for life.
When we lose sight of our spiritual origin, we look for happiness instead within the physical world around us. That does work – for a while - especially when we come together in what feels like loving relationships. But if the basis of these relationships is neediness rather than mutual strength, our character weakens. Habits of dependency grow stronger. We find ourselves lusting after people, possessions, position, or power.
The teachings I have embraced are sometimes summarised as “dying alive”. It means letting go of these worldly attachments and selfish desires, in order to realise the divine, benevolent self.
Unlike some other spiritual traditions, however, this does not mean losing a love for life. It means dying to selfish desires. Whereas lust “takes”, true love comes from our divine origin, and gives without limits.
The sisters who founded the Brahma Kumaris movement were full of joy, but it was a joy based on the inner truth that becomes your own when you let go of mundane means of maintaining happiness. Their lives were fully expressive of this joy, and the desire that others should learn how to find it within themselves.
Armed with this realisation, I am better placed to cope with the “ghosts” of old, negative tendencies that sometimes arise on the spiritual journey. It is the death of all these old habits that is gradually bringing me back to life!
Neville Hodgkinson is a UK-based author
and journalist, and a long-time student of Rajyoga.
