By: Neville Hodgkinson
Source: The Daily Guardian https://epaper.thedailyguardian.com/view/2475/the-daily-guardian/15
Dated: May 24th, 2025

Have you noticed that out of the many books, articles and videos offering guidance on how to improve our lives, a large number focus on strengthening self-respect? It is clearly a great need of our times.

Much practical wisdom is shared on topics such as becoming emotionally self-sufficient, setting boundaries, and not looking for approval from others. But how does this advice fit in with centuries-old teachings urging us to care for one another? That to give, is to receive? The answer is that such giving does work, but it must come naturally, from the heart. And for that, we have to know how to keep the heart full. 

Lack of self-respect is not the root of our problem. Rather, it is a hollow in our hearts that comes from not knowing our spiritual selves. There is an essence to us that connects us to the flow of life. When we think and act in ways that align with this essence, the sky is the limit as to the happiness and fulfilment we can find in being. This then spills over into our relationships, bringing genuine benefit to those with whom we share our lives, without making them feel they owe us anything.

Our essence has this incredibly constructive, beautiful, creative potential. It is natural, it is truth, and it needs to be re-experienced and regularly savoured in order to charge the battery of our wellbeing. Choose the company of thoughts, as well as other people, which help it grow. Love yourself! Practise remaining positive in the face of challenges. Accept people and circumstances for who and what they are, but do not remain chained to a life that does not feel you. When you experience that love and appreciation are your true nature, you will be able to stop focusing on people’s defects, and see their strengths instead. 

Carl Jung, the great Swiss psychologist, famously told us: “Look into your own heart - who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” Once we have awoken to the beauty of the inner being, we do not have to fight to maintain our respect, by chasing the approval of others. We will automatically find the clarity and courage to say no to things that do not reflect it. 

Meditation is all about looking inside, dropping negative habits of thought and beliefs that hold us back in life, and becoming alert to the inner strength and beauty that are our natural inheritance from the One above. 

Neville Hodgkinson is a UK-based author
and a journalist, and a long-time student of Rajyoga.